One of God's Angels came to see me this morning. She came in the form of a nurse. You may be asking yourself if I am just simply sleep deprived and losing my mind,actually that could be a possibility, however, let me give you the last 24 hours in a nut shell.
Yesterday morning, Baby A began having heart decelerations. This is common to see and isn't too worrisome unless a pattern persist or the baby's heart rate becomes dangerously low. At first, I thought, great we are only 5 days into this madness and we already have something to "worry" about. Throughout the day, the heart decelerations worsened. The doctor on call ordered the steroid shots, "just in case" and last night I spent two hours talking to the head neonatal intensive care doctor. Of course, during the conversation with the NICU doctor, they give you 100 more reasons to "worry". I did however really like this doctor and he ended our conversation with how doctors really are only able to do so much for these preemie babies, and the rest lies in God's hands. He even said, babies that are prayed for tend to do better. He said miracles happen around him all the time. I can't help but know this man believes in the power of our Mighty God.
Fast forward to midnight, I am preparing to go to sleep when all of a sudden the strong steady sound of a galloping horse (baby A's heart beat)begins to slow down (as it had earlier in the day) but this time it stayed down for a significant amount of time.Slowly it came back up and then immediately dropped again. The second time it dropped to 90 and very slowly crept back up to 110. Of course alarms started going off and my nurse rushed in here immediately. She had me turn and readjust my position, it didn't help. Then she began pushing around on my abdomen to arouse the baby and eventually the heart rate stabilized. Well, after a scare like that, drifting off into a deep sleep is the last thing on my agenda. This process continued several more times between 1am and 4am. Needless to say, there was NO sleep and ALOT of "worry" all night. So, here is where God sends me His angel.
6:00am Nurse Eva arrives. She can obviously tell I am a complete wreck of nerves and beyond exhaustion. After she talks to me about the course of events from yesterday and last night, she says, "Can I pray with you?" Her prayer was completely God speaking to me through her. I have no doubt about it. I wish you all could have been in the room with us. Purely amazing. She prayed the most amazing prayer of peace and of hope and faith in our Mighty God. She held my hands tightly, prayed so genuinely, cried with me and she had only introduced herself to me 5 minutes earlier. This woman was sent to me for a very real purpose. God sent her to reassure me that HE has it under control. I shouldn't have a reason to doubt that He doesn't. I felt the Holy Spirit in my room this morning, and God sent Eva to me at just the right time. He says, "Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged,for I am your God, I will protect you and hold you in My right hand" I know that worry is a lack of Faith and I don't' want my God to think that I don't have Faith. Please pray for me, I am so weak and powerless, He is so strong and powerful.
As always, I will never be able to thank everyone who is praying for us and our miracle babies. Please continue and make sure to thank GOD for what He has done already.